The rite of passage

I have been silent for quite some time, blog-o-sphere wise. There has been so much to write about, but because it is all happening so fast, I haven't had a chance to sit down to type it out.

A month ago I embarked on one of the greatest journeys ever. I took my son away for several days on a camping trip and with a little help from Family Life Today, I walked him into the knowledge of manhood. My wife had taken the same journey with our two daughters, respectively, of course. My wife and I chose the age of eleven years old hoping to catch them before they had been exposed to a tainted message of maturity, but old enough for it all to be relevant.

Ricky crossing from tree to tree.

With our cabin booked at the KOA in Hagerstown, MD, we took off for three days and two nights of masculinity at its finest; fishing, cooking and eating a whole lot of meat, fire, and outdoor activity. Oh yeah, there was a pretty good bit of World Series baseball too. We didn't rough it too much. As I said, Family Life helped out greatly. All three of our children received "the talk" from Dennis and Barbara Rainey, and let me tell you, as uncomfortable as the whole situation can be, they made it significantly simpler. With their help, I was able to equip my son to navigate life's most difficult obstacles, even harder than this one at River Rider's aerial adventure park.

A couple things here. First of all, parents, you gotta do this. No matter how you found these things out, the best way for your young person to get this kind of information is straight from mom and/or dad. It IS awkward. It has the potential to be embarrassing. It is so much easier for them to just pick it up somewhere from a friend, or something. You gotta do this.  You've heard the adage, "If you want something done right, do it yourself." Trust me. You want this done right. This is responsibility at its highest level.

Doing some serious reading and thinking.

Also, don't feel like there is only one uncomfortable way to handle this. This time away was one of the greatest times I have ever had as a father. I heartily endorse the Passport to Purity materials. I was never sat down and given the low-down on the facts of life. I had nothing to draw from (aside from my own life now) and I am sure many, if not most, of you are in the same boat. Using this gave me the platform to communicate to my son all that was on my heart. It helped us both to open up, to be transparent and talk about some tough stuff. But now...what can't we talk about? Nothing. There is nothing off limits. We can talk about anything, especially now that we've taken on the mechanics and the biology of the birds and the bees.



 God has blessed me with tremendous family relationships. I am excited to say that the bond between my son and I has been strengthened 100-fold through the time that was intentionally given to dealing with some of life's most complicating things, manhood, purity, sexuality, and relating to the opposite sex. Don't dodge it. Take it head on. Make it something to celebrate. You'll be so glad you did.

Wisdom Cries...Walk in the way of good men

Proverbs 2:20 "That thou mayest walk in the way of good men, and keep the paths of the righteous."

Where have all the good guys gone? There's a question that has been exhausted in books, songs, blogs, internet forums, and anywhere else people are feeling the loss of a rare breed...a good man. Don't you just miss the days of real men that you could look up to as masculine role models; strong, hard men with a good heart who would do whatever it took to stand for right? Remember who used to be the "heroes"? Cowboys and soldiers all the way to superheroes and athletes inspired young fellas to grow up and be something, and they did. These guys set the pace for us.

Now, where do we look for good men? It seems everyone in the spotlight isn't worth looking at. Everyone with a public voice isn't saying anything worth listening to. We still have soldiers, and for that I am thankful. There are still a couple athletes or prominent personalities, but they are the exception. What we really need is a generation of men to rise above the current perceptions of manhood. All that is good and right and smart is crying out for some real men, some good men to step up and step out; out of the crowd and walk to the front and lead. The wisdom of God's word has a specific goal or purpose. We ought to look into it. read it, and do what it says. That's where good men come from. That is the mold that true strength and leadership is cut from. Read the word of God and follow the examples of Moses (leadership), Joshua (courage), David (character), prophets who cared enough for their land to cry out against sin and stand in the middle of social wickedness and immorality, and of course, Jesus (servant-leadership). Why is there a drought of good men? Because the Bible is no longer esteemed as the word of God. It used to be read in school and in those days a guys handshake was better than any contract. His word was trustworthy. His integrity was his most valued possession. He treated other men, the elderly, children, and ladies with respect. He honored authority in his life and he tried to set a good example for those after him. I know it sounds old-fashioned, but you know what? I have never heard anyone ever say, "I sure am glad things aren't like they used to be." Let that sink in...like they used to be. How did it used to be? It wasn't hard to find good men. Hey, let's listen to wisdom. Let's walk in the way of good men.