False starts, forgets, and failures

Everybody likes a fresh start. I think of how many sheets of paper I have wasted because I didn't want to jot down a simple piece of information on a used sheet of paper. I have stacks of used yellow legal pads and if you were to peruse the pages of these pads, you would find that most of the pages have writing only on the top 4-6 lines. I am convinced it is that way in life. I play golf, not to be mistaken for, "I am a golfer", and so I am way too familiar with the mulligan, not the stew. We are all big fans of the ever popular "second chance" and I have even been know to invoke the power of the "do-over".

Question, what do the New Year's resolution, a life coach, and religious experience have in common? (Think Jeopardy tune here) Answer, the smaller they are in the rear view mirror, the less impact they have in your life. Nearly all of us, at one time or another, have made an attempt at using one of these methods, or others, of turning over a new leaf, changing something we do not like about our self. And as I said, as we move forward from that time, place, and/or person we lose something. Maybe we change our mind and what we thought was important fades or it was never important enough for us to really commit to. Perhaps it was something that you really wanted to succeed in but you just couldn't get it right and you gave up. As I drove to my office this morning, listening to the radio, I heard these words, "I am redeemed, you set me free" and I began to ponder the permanent nature of the change that Christ made in my life. Granted, there are still a ton of things about me that I do not like and certainly wish to change, but He set me free. Free from what? Good question. Well, Jesus Christ has freed me from the law of sin and death. I don't have to sin and I don't have to die eternally. Of course we know it is appointed unto man once to die, but I know that I have everlasting life because of the only begotten Son of God, John 3:16. That means that He has freed me from the guilt of all that I have messed up in my life, places where I broke the law of God, James 2:10. We celebrate freedom in this country everyday, but on July 4, we really go all out. I can go "all out" everyday as I celebrate my freedom in Christ, because nothing and no one can change that status. It is permanent. No other freedom is.

Think about the permanence in these thoughts.

• John 8:36, If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed.
• Lamentations 3:22, 23, It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning. Great is thy faithfulness.
• Psalm 73:26 ...God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever.

So stop trying the best ideas on the internet or the latest self improvement plan. Let me encourage you, come to Jesus. That would be no temporary fix or limited time offer. And if you are concerned about the catch because you think you may be prone to false starts, forgets, and failures, yes there is fine print at the bottom of this offer. So if you are skeptical, just scroll down and read the fine print. This isn't about a religious experience. This is about a relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ. In all the years that I have been a believer, I have had those false starts, forgets, and failures, but because He is a friend that sticks closer than a brother, Proverbs 18:24, He is never in my rear view mirror. He is always right beside me and that's a great perspective.

I John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

Boys to Men

I have mentioned how I love to be a daddy. That is only half of the truth. I also love to be a dad. Now that may sound redundant to you, but hear me out, or rather, read me out. See, I am only daddy to two people. You're onto me now, aren't you? Have you figured out that my son does not call me daddy? He calls me dad and I am totally cool with that. Truthfully, I can't remember the last time he did call me daddy. Perhaps it was around the time I realized that I am not raising children, I am raising people. I am not raising a baby boy, or a little boy. I am raising a man. My friend, if you haven't had the privilege of parenting at least one boy and one girl, let me tell you, it is different. Even though books are still being published about the lack of difference, the real life that I live has made that assertion laughable.

I am in the middle of a book, again. I am not a huge reader so I am always "in the middle" of a book. As last time, this is not a book review, nor it is an endorsement of all that the book teaches, but it has shown itself to be insightful and I think with some doctrinal discretion, you could really learn from it. Alright already, the book is Wild at Heart by John Eldredge and it is aptly titled. Through scripture, psychology, and experience, the author rebuilds the machine that once was man, a real man. I'm talking about the kind of man that we used to look up to 30, 40, 50 years ago. There is certainly a ton of stuff that could be said right here about the current state of masculinity in our society, or better stated, the lack of masculinity, but that is for another time. I am more interested in sharing how I have seen my son respond to life as we go and grow together.
                                                                                 

I have watched Ricky drive a car in Disney (here). I have watched him swell with excitement as his Uncle Steve asked, "You wanna fly it?" through a headset and handed over the controls to his airplane, a Piper Cherokee 6, a couple years ago over the hills of North Carolina. This is same uncle that Ricky loves for his practically brand new Corvette. His love for mechanical things and movement, proven by research to develop sooner and stronger in boys than girls, has driven him, no pun intended, into my stored away collection of Automobile magazines that aren't even current. I picked up the subscription from the inaugural issue in like 1986, and collected each monthly issue for the next five years. And this drive shows no sign of slowing. Right now, in fact, literally right now he is probably immersed in the latest library borrow, Need for Speed for the Wii and his latest behind the wheel experience was just two days ago on a friend's boat. Again, the question, "You wanna drive it?" In case you were wondering, here is your answer...

I guess what I want to really say here is, let your boys be boys. That's the only way they will grow to be men, real men. Right now, I am stoked at the thought of filling his life with opportunities to grow into Biblical manhood. In case you are wondering, that is the kind of man that knows what it means to be tough but not mean, strong but not pushy, brave but not stupid, sensitive but not soft, and confident but not arrogant. So we like to camp and grill and eat meat (cooked, let's not get crazy here). We enjoy shooting the bow and arrows and the rifles. But the best part, we like to spend time talking, talking about what he is thinking and what he is feeling, and that's a pretty good bit at eleven years old. Of course, where he does his best thinking and talking seems to be in the woods. Oh I love to be called "Daddy" especially when it comes from real close to me with those beautiful eyes looking up at me, but being called "Dad" has become a call back to what I feel God intended for us men, at least, that's my perspective.

Thanks to Uncle Steve for providing this photo from the day Ricky flew the plane. If you think he looks like he is having the time of his life, it's because he was.

The Power of One

Let me start with the background for this thought. In II Kings 17, the king of Assyria, Shalmaneser, removed the people of Israel from the cities of Samaria and replaced them with Babylonians and others of the surrounding lands. Because these new inhabitants did not fear the Lord, the Lord sent lions among them and slew some of the people. In verse 26, the explanation is offered to the king, "The nations which thou hast removed, and placed in the cities of Samaria, know not the manner of the God of the land: therefore he hath sent lions among them, and behold, they slay them because they know not the manner of the God of the land." The solution was then offered to the king, "Carry thither one of the priests whom ye brought from thence...and let him teach them the manner of the God of the land." And there it is...the challenge to be the one. One man was dispatched to Samaria to make a difference in the midst of all of the people living there. 

There is an old English proverb that says, "Better to light one candle than to curse the darkness." When I read that proverb, immediately the portion of scripture from Matthew 5:14, "Ye are the light of the world" came to mind. Whether we choose to believe it or not, one person can make a difference. And before you say, "Sure, but not this person", let me remind you of what Helen Keller said. “I am only one; but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something. I will not refuse to do the something I can do.” I know not one person living with the difficulties or impairments of Helen Keller.  I'll put it this way, the inability to do everything should not keep you from doing something. Be that one. The Bible tells us that these new inhabitants feared the Lord after the priest moved in with them and taught them. Get involved. I would say even if it is with just one person, but that minimizes the effect you could have. Intentionally seek to be a difference maker in the life of someone and then move on to someone else and so on. Having had the opportunity to mentor a young man has brought me to a deeper dependence on the Lord. I realized that I really did not have what he needed so I was forced to seek God for help and direction. Through that time I adopted the words I still pray regularly, "Lord, grant me words and wisdom to make a difference."

And there is the beginning of being the one. If you desire to be a "one", someone who effects positive change in the lives of others, you must follow after the One who is the orchestrator of the greatest change ever, a changed heart. The One through whom "old things are passed away, behold, all things are become new." We can pull from that scripture in II Kings that the best that one person can do is teach/exemplify the word/ways of God to people, not lion tame. Deal at the root and that will change the fruit. I will leave you with one last quote. It is a quote that is often mistakenly attributed to D.L. Moody, but it was actually a very intimate friend of his that said,"It remains to be seen what God will do with a man who gives himself up wholly unto Him." To which D.L. Moody replied, "Well I will be that man." There is power in one. Through a right relationship with God through His son, the Lord Jesus Christ, you can be that one. God help us all to say and mean, "Well I will be that one." I hope you feel that way too, otherwise, it's just my perspective.

Oh yeah, now you're talkin'...

This is not intended to be an actual book review but the book, The Five Love Languages, did so much for me and my family that I would certainly recommend the reading of it by, at the very least, every husband and wife. As I sat on a very comfortable new white wicker chair that is part of a patio furniture set Jen purchased with birthday money, on a wood pergola patio that I designed and built myself over the course of two years, drinking a cup of fresh coffee, reading my Bible with my best friend this morning, my mind flipped back to the pages of that book. We have only been using the pergola for these quiet morning moments for a couple of weeks now and we have really come to enjoy the earlier morning hours, the cool of the day, for not just the library-esque atmosphere for reading, but the uninterrupted peace and quiet where we are able to connect at the beginning of what is always a very busy day. There are, as the book surmises, five basic love languages; quality time, receiving of gifts, acts of service, physical touch, and words of affirmation. I will not attempt a synopsis of the book here, so I will cut to the chase and tell you that at the back of the book is a test to score in order to determine your love language. We all took the test, including our kids. It was a blast finding out what we, in a way, already knew. I ended up being "bilingual", with two equal high scores, as did Jen. I don't think I feel comfortable enough to share the results with you so you will just have to guess or skip it. I will say that it has proven indispensable knowing what Jen's are and her knowing mine. Before the book, I did what I thought expressed my affection for her to the max. What I found out was that my expressions of love to her made me feel good, but didn't really float her boat. They were nice things and I am sure that we all enjoy some of each love language being spoken into our life, but man, when I found out exactly what conveyed to Jen how I really feel about her, it changed everything. And that was a two-way street...bonus!

There is a "Buyer Beware" that should be included with the book. I'll put it this way, "With great power comes great responsibility." By the way, Voltaire is credited with saying that first, but I'm a big Spiderman fan and so I will attribute that line to Stan Lee. Anyway, along with the benefit of you and your spouse possessing the knowledge of just what right buttons to push for each other (great power), there is now the great responsibility to do just that. And believe me, you will be held accountable by the other if you neglect that responsibility. But really, what a joy to now know how to speak (or display) my love for Jen in a way that I am sure she is "getting". Why would anyone not want to be able to do that? In my mind, this book should be a best seller just from the men who say "I guess I just don't understand women." So, back to the pergola patio, chair, coffee, and my wife. I could easily point to each aspect of our morning and slide it under one of the love language headings but what I really came to value was the opportunity we have created to truly express ourselves. What am I saying? First, get the book and read it. Take the test and really get to know each other. Then create the environment for you to comfortably apply what you know. Hey, for us it's a pergola patio in the morning, but for you it may be a new movie and carry-out Chinese food. Whatever or where ever it is, make it a priority. Oh yeah, in case you were really paying attention, we sit close enough in the pergola to hold hands or rub a shoulder. That's pretty important to Jen and I, hint, hint. Now, at the beginning of the summer,  I am already looking for a new environment for the winter because it is so worth it, from my Perspective.

Here's a question you may have asked before...

In my devotion time this morning I finished the book of I Kings and got into the next book, II Kings. I read the answer to the question first, and then I got to the question. In II Kings 2:14, Elisha asks the question, "Where is the Lord God of Elijah?" Now you may have referenced that to another person, but the spirit of the question remains the same, "Where is God?" I will answer that shortly, but first I need to identify with Elisha. Maybe you can too. Elisha asks this question upon standing at the brink of the Jordan River, a river he just crossed with his mentor, Elijah, a man of God that Elisha had seen used of God to perform several incredible miracles. Elisha heard Elijah speak words of prophecy that came to pass as accurately as they were spoken. Elisha saw Elijah call fire from heaven to destroy a couple captains and their troops, from King Ahaziah. And at the last, Elisha watched as Elijah made the grandest of exits from this world as a chariot of fire with horses of fire took Elijah up in a whirlwind. Elisha had truly seen the power and ability of God...in someone else's life. Now his mentor is gone. Now he stands on the edge of the Jordan River, no small meandering creek, and has a decision to make. We have all stood in this place with this same decision to make. It comes during times of great loss or loneliness, Elijah was gone, or it comes in the face of an insurmountable circumstance, the Jordan River. We have all asked this question, "Where is God!? I have seen Him work in the life of others. Where is He in my life?" I do not know that the question in and of itself is a bad thing. In another portion of scripture, God invited us to prove Him. Ask your questions, but don't stop there. Elisha didn't ask the question and then sit on the bank and wait. He had in his possession a mantle that once belonged to Elijah. Now the answer wasn't in a piece of fabric, but the fabric was simply the evidence of all that had been handed down, exemplified, and taught by Elijah. Now it was his. What would he do with it. Well, the Bible tells us that after he asked the question, he "applied" what he received from Elijah. He smote the water and the river parted.

So where is God; only with a prophet, in a prophet's mantle, or on the bank of a river? Don't be so quick to put God in a box. That is what the king of Syria did in I Kings 20:23, "Their gods are gods of the hills..." In verse 28 God replies with, "Because the Syrians have said, The Lord is God of the hills, but He is not God of the valleys, therefore will I deliver..." Bottom line is God is God everywhere, hills and valleys. David said, in Psalm 139, in my words, "Where can I go from your spirit and where can I hide from your presence?" The answer is nowhere.

Shortly after reading this morning, I encountered a raging river of questions and emotions. Causing the river to swirl and foam were great rocks of disappointment. I have seen God work in the past. Where is He now? Why does He not answer or move on my behalf? Thankfully, these verses were not too distant to come back and help me. You have asked too. But don't just ask and then sit. Take what you have received, the word of God, the example from the lives of others, the testimony of His work in you and apply it. He is there. Where? Where you are. I love these words, "He hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee." And from this side of the river, that must be my Perspective.

God's perspective

This is for all of my "performance-based" Christian friends. You know who you are but please read all the way to the end. I'm not trying to rub you the wrong way, but you tend to be a judgmental lot, sometimes looking down on others because the outward evidence of their relationship with Christ does not look like yours. They struggle with successful application of the Bible in their life and therefore must not be as spiritual as you. You have a checklist or cookie cutter of what a Christian should be and there is sometimes a condescending view of those outside the cookie cutter or with an incomplete checklist of dos and don'ts. Most of you are saying already, "That's not me" and you are probably telling the truth, but then you may still be judgmental, just not toward others. You might be judgmental toward yourself. You realize that there are characteristics, behaviors, or fruits that are associated with a personal relationship with Jesus and because you don't fulfill them all in the course of your day, you condemn yourself to guilt and uselessness in the kingdom of God because you believe yourself to be unworthy, unforgivable, and maybe even unlovable. Judgmental, just the same. Now I know that many or most of you know that a relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ, according to Ephesians 2:8,9, is by grace, through faith, and not of works, but I run across a lot of folks that intentional or not, make works a necessary ingredient to either receiving salvation and/or "keeping" salvation, maybe better understood if stated this way, getting saved and staying saved. Moreover, Christian performance is frequently utilized as a grading scale for spirituality. For example, wouldn't you say that it is a common assumption that the people that never miss a church service must be closer to God? Or people that are dressed especially nice for every service? Or the most generous givers in the church? Certainly we know that is not always the case, yet many times we are intimidated by those that live with more stringent convictions, seem to have it all together, and surely never trip up. Then there is the other side of the coin. Once we see an epic failure in the life of a brother or sister in Christ it does not seem to be too far a leap to think that they are surely fallen from grace, if they were ever saved before. And again, for my self-deprecating readers, we see our own epic failure as a disqualifier and count ourselves finished, if we ever got started. If you haven't noticed yet, I tend to be that one that disappoints myself.

Well, this morning I was reading in the book of I Kings and ran across this passage in 11:38, "...keep my statutes and commandments, as David my servant did." What!? Not the same David that peeped while Bathsheba was bathing? The same David that was wrecking a home when the man of the house wasn't home? The very same conniving David who brought Uriah home from the battle to try and cover his own underhanded deeds? And the same David that turned his back on one of his own highly skilled, trusted and proven, mighty men of valor (II Samuel 23:39), and set him up to be slain in battle defending the one who wanted him dead? That's what I said. But what did God say? In I Kings 9:4, He said, "And if thou wilt walk before me, as David thy father walked, in integrity of heart..." There's the rub. There is what elevated David to such an exemplary place in the Bible. It wasn't that he walked, but how he walked. I checked a Bible software program and saw that God (capital G) is in our KJV Bible 4,106 times. Israel is there 2,576. Other than the creator of the universe and the country that the vast majority of the Bible takes place in, David's is the name that is mentioned most at 1,139 times. "Father" Abraham is only mentioned 250 times and Moses 848. What did God really think of David and why? God loved David because of his heart for God. Did David fail? Sure. But from God's Perspective, David was "a man after His own heart", I Samuel 13:14.  Remember, man looks on the outward appearance, but God looks on the heart.

How about you? Do failures in the life of others cause you to judge them harshly? Do failures in your life cause you to judge yourself harshly? One of my favorite passages of scripture is Proverbs 24:16, "For a just man falleth seven times and riseth up again..." Christian, that's for us when we fall. Just get back up again. And if you are one that has a hard time seeing past someone else's failure, can I encourage you with Galatians 6:1? "Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted." We would all be far better off if these two verses were regularly lived out. I know I would. That's just my Perspective.

There always seems to be so much to say...

I have participated in two other blog ventures and I hate to say it, but they fizzled. I am a wordy person. I love to communicate, mostly by speech, but writing is a close second. You could say that I am a professional communicator as a pastor. With direction from God, I gather thoughts and ideas from Bible study and prepare them in an organized fashion, usually a three point outline, and deliver those thoughts in what I hope is an articulate and interesting sermon. Not only that, but for the last month I have been preparing a power point presentation to further communicate the principles being preached from the Bible. I am happy to say that I regularly carry on conversation with each of my three children and when I say "carry on", I mean carry on. Laughter is a major form of communication in the Wilson home, perhaps the most widely used. We also write notes and cards for one another, not just for holidays. Communication with my wife, that is to say talking, has been a staple of our relationship from the very beginning. In fact, it was the very beginning. Those who know our story know that our "story-book marriage" is the fruit of a prank call gone right. What started as a practical joke ended as a two hour conversation...and it started. We talked on the phone every day for a couple months before we even officially met. We joke about how much we have talked. One memorable occasion is a road trip to North Carolina to visit her grandparents. We were still just dating so we had to drive straight through and we did. We drove straight to North Wilkesboro, North Carolina from Port Deposit, Maryland and as long as the car ran, we talked...and laughed. We had such a great time doing that on the way down that we repeated it on the way back. What can two people possibly talk about for ten hours straight? Twice?

Well, that brings me back to the thought in the title today. Although I seem to always have something to say and I have been planning this blog for the last six or seven months with so many things I wanted to write about, now that I have put keyboard to screen (think pen to paper) all of those wonderful musings have escaped me. One thing is certain, with the life God has blessed me with and the people God has blessed my life with, I will have more to say. Thanks for joining me and check back often to get a daily dose of Perspective.