One of the most influential people in my life

For nearly 27 years, I have called her Mom, and as such she has, for every one of those years, been a teacher, guide, cheerleader, prayer warrior, example, and friend. Just as a mom should, she has corrected me, advised me, cried with me, prayed for me, and most tenderly loved me. But more importantly, she has done the same and more in the life of my wonderful wife, as her devoted mother. Those who know me know I am not a fan of the term "in-law". When I married Jennifer Burroughs, I inherited a family with no dashes or strings attached. Jen's mom is my mom. I propose a better reference to replace MIL. How about MOMS, Mother Of My Spouse?

I am grateful for her and have chosen today to express as much because tomorrow is her birthday. But this is no attempt to butter her up or gain brownie points. I finished that during our courting years when I wrote in a Mother's Day card, "My dad told me if I want to know what my wife will look like, just look at her mother. If that is true, then I am a lucky man." Pretty good, huh? That might not be exactly what I wrote, but it is very close and most of all, it worked. I have been putty in her hands ever since. No, I did not mix that up ;) My actual intention is to raise awareness of the tremendous good our MOMS are and do, yet their reputation does not reflect that. Believe me, I have seen and heard why. MOMS, in many cases, have not aided their cause. Unfortunately, these bad apples have spoiled the bunch. So if you have a good and godly MOMS, say as much. Certainly say it to her. She has doubly influenced your life for the good, in raising a husband or wife who loves Christ and you, and then she has taken you in and lead and loved you as her own. At least, that is what she has done in my life. Now take that understanding and, while you have time and opportunity, give honor where honor is due. Don't allow society to dictate how you talk about her. Don't give in to the assumption that "mother-in-law" jokes and insults are normal. MOMS and future MOMS, don't live up to this "popular belief". Influence your children for good. Their future wife/husband will be blessed by your efforts. If you are already in this position, use your influence to encourage and mentor a well-lived life. You can have that kind of influence if you refrain from complaining, interfering, and bossing.

So Happy Birthday (a day early) Mom. I love and appreciate you. You have been an example to my wife, to me, and I have to assume, to many other ladies who have endeavored to serve the Lord and raise a godly generation.

The best view of the best shooting stars, ever

Season's Greetings and Happy Holidays! Oh forget that...Merry Christmas! It is my favorite time of the year. It is for a lot of people, but for me, Christmas highlights why I love to be a "family" man. Many will say that Christmas is just for children. Sorry, I'm not going for that. Because Christmas is about a person, not all of the stuff and fluff, everyone can and should enjoy the blessedness of the season. Anyway, with all of our traditions and their corresponding memories, I find it so easy to love being a husband and father. I so enjoy time spent together and giving of gifts, etc. etc.

Well, last night I was reminded how totally awesome it is to be a daddy and it really had nothing to do with Christmas. After getting home from coaching my son's basketball team (great stuff all by itself), and seeing on Twitter that many friends were out watching the meteor shower, we headed out the back door. Now, I have always loved where we live because we have always had a great sky view, but last night was perfect. The sky was cloudless and because we live in the boondocks, we have little to no light pollution. Before long, there were four bodies side by side by side, me and my three kids, laying flat on our deck with nothing but wide open sky and the Geminids straight up. All of us were sharing one huge quilt, and there we lay for over a half hour. We "Ooohed" and "Aaahed", counted, compared, and shivered. The only thing that hindered our view of the night sky was the thick clouds of our own breath. We scooched as tightly together as we could to keep warm and laughed at how cold and crazy we were.

In spite of the 27 degrees, I forgot how cold I was for a while as I laid there listening to the wonder and excitement of three people that bring the same to me. I was reminded of the great privilege I have had to be a part of God's great plan for three people who, I am sure, will change the world; three individuals with the awareness of a great God, His awesome creative power, and His ability and desire to create something wonderful in them. I was reminded how great it is to spend time together without a TV, DVD, Wii, or anything else; just each other, a blanket, and a God who loves us. It could be said that last night was exceptionally special for one of my kids who said, "Don't you know? It is my lifelong dream to see a shooting star?" Well, there was her dream come true, but from my Perspective, my dreams came true 19, 17, and 12 years ago, and I am reminded that they keep coming true as I watch my children, like shooting stars, burn brightly across the sky of my life, unfortunately far too quickly.

Family Devotion

This morning I have a couple firsts. The first first you may pick up on quickly because the blog itself may look different. I am writing this on my phone through the Blogger app and having never used it before, I am not sure how it will turn out. For that reason, I will probably be brief. And please overlook any typos and autospell mistakes. I will come back later and fix any mistakes I missed.
The second first of the day was just wrapped up and I wanted to report it to you. The Wilson family has always had a devotion time. When the kids were younger, Bible reading and prayer as a family was more frequent but as they have grown we have stressed personal Bible reading and devotion. I am always looking for new and exciting ways to incorporate the Bible into our family living and that tends to be challenging as my family gets older. Maybe this new way of "devoting" together will encourage you and your family. Last week I asked Jen to pick up five small spiral bound notebooks. These are 5.5 x 4.25 with 200 sheets. I passed out the notebooks to each family member, along with a pen in the spiral. At the beginning of the week I suggested a scripture reference that we all wrote on the front of a page. For the last week we have been memorizing the verse if we didn't already know it and each of us were to write our personal impressions or thoughts about the verse in our notebooks. This morning we all came together after breakfast and shared what tidbits we wrote in our notebooks. This spurred a great conversation among all of us and allowed each to express their own understanding or what the verse said to them. I am totally excited over the content and participation in this new devotion method. Everyone had personal insights to share and we all gained a greater understanding of the verse because of it. The verse was Romans 3:23 which was a familiar verse to start with and here are some of the thoughts that were shared from my family.
- All of society's religions or rituals are an attempt to approach God or hit the mark of righteousness, and every one of us miss. We fall short.
- Not only do we all sin, but we all fall short in our effort.
- It is not just a matter of "messing up". We are all sinners, truly sinful. Let's not minimize that.
- No one is perfect. We all need healing.
- Although we are all unique creations of God, we are bound by the commonality of our sinfulness.
What a blessing to hear these truths come from the hearts, minds, and mouths of my family. By the way, the back side of each page is for recording the thoughts from every one else. We picked a new scripture for memorization and study this week and I am really looking forward to building on this new special time of family devotion. I encourage you to bring the Bible, its reading and teaching into your family. It certainly does not have to be this way, but I am sure that if you can incorporate the Bible into your family life, there is a much greater chance that your children will incorporate it into their personal life, at least, that's my Perspective.
Now I am heading into the pool with my family. Stay safe and cool today and be sure to check on someone you know could be in danger today because of the extreme weather.

Oh yeah, now you're talkin'...

This is not intended to be an actual book review but the book, The Five Love Languages, did so much for me and my family that I would certainly recommend the reading of it by, at the very least, every husband and wife. As I sat on a very comfortable new white wicker chair that is part of a patio furniture set Jen purchased with birthday money, on a wood pergola patio that I designed and built myself over the course of two years, drinking a cup of fresh coffee, reading my Bible with my best friend this morning, my mind flipped back to the pages of that book. We have only been using the pergola for these quiet morning moments for a couple of weeks now and we have really come to enjoy the earlier morning hours, the cool of the day, for not just the library-esque atmosphere for reading, but the uninterrupted peace and quiet where we are able to connect at the beginning of what is always a very busy day. There are, as the book surmises, five basic love languages; quality time, receiving of gifts, acts of service, physical touch, and words of affirmation. I will not attempt a synopsis of the book here, so I will cut to the chase and tell you that at the back of the book is a test to score in order to determine your love language. We all took the test, including our kids. It was a blast finding out what we, in a way, already knew. I ended up being "bilingual", with two equal high scores, as did Jen. I don't think I feel comfortable enough to share the results with you so you will just have to guess or skip it. I will say that it has proven indispensable knowing what Jen's are and her knowing mine. Before the book, I did what I thought expressed my affection for her to the max. What I found out was that my expressions of love to her made me feel good, but didn't really float her boat. They were nice things and I am sure that we all enjoy some of each love language being spoken into our life, but man, when I found out exactly what conveyed to Jen how I really feel about her, it changed everything. And that was a two-way street...bonus!

There is a "Buyer Beware" that should be included with the book. I'll put it this way, "With great power comes great responsibility." By the way, Voltaire is credited with saying that first, but I'm a big Spiderman fan and so I will attribute that line to Stan Lee. Anyway, along with the benefit of you and your spouse possessing the knowledge of just what right buttons to push for each other (great power), there is now the great responsibility to do just that. And believe me, you will be held accountable by the other if you neglect that responsibility. But really, what a joy to now know how to speak (or display) my love for Jen in a way that I am sure she is "getting". Why would anyone not want to be able to do that? In my mind, this book should be a best seller just from the men who say "I guess I just don't understand women." So, back to the pergola patio, chair, coffee, and my wife. I could easily point to each aspect of our morning and slide it under one of the love language headings but what I really came to value was the opportunity we have created to truly express ourselves. What am I saying? First, get the book and read it. Take the test and really get to know each other. Then create the environment for you to comfortably apply what you know. Hey, for us it's a pergola patio in the morning, but for you it may be a new movie and carry-out Chinese food. Whatever or where ever it is, make it a priority. Oh yeah, in case you were really paying attention, we sit close enough in the pergola to hold hands or rub a shoulder. That's pretty important to Jen and I, hint, hint. Now, at the beginning of the summer,  I am already looking for a new environment for the winter because it is so worth it, from my Perspective.